Lamech, Victim Personified 

Cain accepted his exile from his intended realm of influence (husbandry of the ground), accepted that he had to flee from his family, and that he would be in a perpetual state of anxiety (fugitive and vagabond), but he could not bear the thought of someone seeing him rejected by God. Isn’t that what our pride boils down to – how we want others to see us? Isn’t this the root of our image management issues, to control how others see us? God granted Cain’s appeal for protection and set a mark on him so that anyone who killed Cain would be avenged seven times (Gen 4:15).

The promised vengeance was not because of Cain’s righteousness – obviously! God setting his mark on Cain was like the visible seal of the King, which read, “This man is serving a punitive consequential sentence under My authority – do not kill him or you’ll answer to Me.”

The pattern of abdicating personal responsibility and blaming others for the evident unrighteousness in us became the MO for Satan to control our hearts through sin like strings of a puppet – we call this the victim or entitlement mentality: “I want (attraction turned envy) something that I’m not willing to work for (or reconcile for) and it’s everybody else’s fault that I don’t have it and their responsibility to give it!” All kinds of manipulative rebellion comes from this mindset, whether through overt belligerence or passive aggressive undertones, but make no mistake, at its root is the lack of inner peace in a heart unreconciled to their Creator.

As bad as that is, that wrong behavior didn’t stop there. No it progressed into a twisted justification that emotionally pouts and justifies abusive and arrogant behavior. In the sixth generation from Cain, Cain’s distant grandson, Lemech, the first to have multiple wives, said to them,

Then Lamech said to his wives: “Adah and Zillah, hear my voice; wives of Lamech, listen to my speech! For I have killed a man for wounding me, even a young man for hurting me. If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, then Lamech seventy-sevenfold.” Gen 4:23, 24

God’s punitive correction of Cain, by exiling him from his intended realm of blessing, was twisted by Lamech as a validation to kill those who would offend, wound, or hurt his self-importance or fragile ego! As mentioned in describing the nature of the serpent, he is bent to invert good to evil and evil to good by twisting truth from it’s origin. The victim and entitlement mentality is not just a sin, but fosters the very mentality of sin itself!

The entitlement or victim mentality is fueled by unforgiveness and clings to offenses to substantiate and justify unloving thoughts and emotions towards any who offend. If only it stopped there, but it doesn’t! Unforgiveness grows and eats into our very being and we become twisted Lemachs justifying our deep rooted negative perspectives. I

n short, unforgiveness validates our own laziness not to get right with God and man and then blames God and man for our own misery! Pathetic, isn’t it? Too many of us have a network of heart strings that the enemy puppeteers for his purposes. When is the last time you heard a verbal Lemach made edifying contributions in relationships or community? 

Unforgiveness feeds on gossip and loves the ruin of those they envy. Self-pity and complaining are the endless praise anthems of an unforgiving spirit longing to be coddled by all who would hear. The victim and entitlement mentality lives in the dark and it is a very dark place to live.

Unforgiveness attaches through unresolved pain or anger. Most of us would rather not deal with the burr under our saddle, but we will never enjoy the ride until we do. In Matthew 13, Jesus had just taught a lesson on conflict resolve and forgiveness. A very straightforward approach - if someone sins against you, go directly to them, if he will not hear you, take two or three witnesses, if he still will not hear you, bring him before the church and if he still will not hear you, then send him out! Why is that Jesus’ counsel? Because if we have in our independence have a stubborn refusal to take personal responsibility in practicing the principle of mutual relationship, then we are not granted the privilege of mutual relationship. Jesus did not teach that forgiveness absolves or replaces accountability! At the cross the whole whole world is forgiven right now – past, present and future is forgiven! What an astounding truth! But only those who enter the process of reconciliation enjoy relationship with the One who died on the cross! The ironic pain of hell will be that forgiveness was complete, but reconciliation was not! Jesus is offering us mutual relationship through the reconciliation of His cross. God did His part,

…that God was in Christ reconciling the world to Himself, not imputing their trespasses to them, and has committed to us the word of reconciliation. 2 Cor 5:19